In the Distance

I have been reviewing and thinking, again. Darn thought processes. (frown here). Now the x is starting to post stuff publicly about "her". His Tweet this am said, "Norma, friends and Grey Goose...priceless." I recall when he felt that way about me. I think she owes me big time for putting him through relationship boot camp for 8 years. A trait he had no experience with before me. Why do I keep peeking and putting my emotions through this? I will wise up friends. Enough is enough. It's been months, (wow 8) since our separation, and 5 months since our divorce. Claire, get over it, right? I keep trying and still maintain at most times I am okay. Once in a while, though...

I am solidifying my friendships with my new friends at Toastmaster's. Myself and the VP of Membership had a meeting the other day to plan a presentation to introduce a membership drive/contest, to be held for the club. We laughed a lot and came up with a good plan, full of humor of course. We both will be in character and costume for the program on Tuesday the 3rd. My friend said she hopes to keep a straight face through it all. My other Toastmaster friend has been nothing but a good guy sharing male points of view regarding my dissolved marriage and the x's current situation. He even told me he had a vision of me at a book signing event, as the author, with a poster of me as background, and the x was in his camper somewhere. (laugh here). I laughed so hard my cheeks were sore. What a vision! He then said I would be on Oprah Winfrey's book club list. That would be a hoot! He told me this before I shared my blog with him. I just gave him the blog information yesterday. He'll read it when he can and give me his opinion.
I have been able to share female insight with him regarding his "on again off again" relationship. I do have experience in that department as the x and I went through that in 2007 for several months, right before he proposed. (raise an eyebrow here). My friend is a very pleasant, upbeat man, as are my other, new friends. It is interesting how they see potential in my character to be more than I am. They have offered suggestions, support and appreciation for becoming a member of the club and a good person who has more to accomplish. Really? Boy do I need that positive affirmation in my life. (smile here).

As for myself and the new year starting, I do have a few resolutions, but I have my eye on the future, my heart as a whole and my mind at peace. I am looking in the distance to see myself buying that first house to flip, joining Habitat for Humanity, being an asset to Toastmaster's and my friends, and yes, having someone to hold. To my blogger friends, please don't take that simple act for granted.

Comments

Grumpy said…
I think it's natural to wonder what your ex is doing, but at some point you should begin to wean yourself off checking on his life.
January 1, 2011 at 5:43 PM
kden said…
I like your friend's vision about your ex in a trailer. And yes, she should thank you for the training. You'll stop looking at his stuff when you're ready and when your own life feels full enough without the urge to see how full his is. It will happen. Just let me know where the book signing is ;-)
January 1, 2011 at 7:24 PM
Claire M. King said…
Thank you grumpy and kden. I am weaning myself away, but once in a while, I still peek. I am tired of those urges too and have most of them under control. New year, new views of my own.
January 1, 2011 at 8:03 PM
Anonymous said…
Hope you stop looking at the ex's posts soon. I know you struggle with it but next time you want to peak, think twice about it. It brings you sorrow and I hate seeing you so sad.
January 8, 2011 at 1:21 PM
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