Pins and Needles
I had my second interview with the Economic Development Council on Thursday, for the receptionist position. I was interviewed by the deputy director and his administrative assistant. I feel the interview went well, and it was 40 minutes of normal questions and a portion was a, "getting to know me" segment. I was comfortable and the nervousness subsided rather quickly.
Derek text-ed me shortly thereafter and wondered how it went. I wrote back that I felt it went well. At 4:45 PM on Friday afternoon, after not hearing any word of the interview or job, I text-ed Derek and wrote,"Torturing your candidates through the weekend? LOL." I heard no response, so I am on pins and needles wondering what of the situation. If I can't get a job as a receptionist with an organization my friend has a partial decision in making, I am a goner. I dutifully know that he will still be my friend, regardless. But waiting to hear any word of the situation is creating anxiety. I feel distracted, emotionally low and frustrated.
Then, my son re-nags on two "get togethers" with me. It is funny how in talking with my son, we can lift each other up and add levity to a situation. When he called after 5:30 on Friday and changed plans for an Olympia visit to Saturday instead, I was fine with that. I understood his busy schedule. Now, it is after 7:00 PM on Saturday and he has not returned two of my phone calls, of which I did not place until after 6:30 PM. I knew he would not be here until later this afternoon, but this is ridiculous. I left him a message and requested he not just come down late tonight as my housemate probably wouldn't appreciate it. I turned down an invitation to go to a play with some friends of mine as I was anticipating my son's visit. Now, I am just mad at him. Mad at the inconsideration's of so many people, when I try so hard to be responsible and considerate.
Are these pins and needles life threatening? NO. Will my world come to an end? NO. Are these situations as sad as many I have observed for others? NO. Do I deserve to be mad at my son? YES. So there, I am just mad. Despite my mood and feelings not changing any circumstance, I will fester for a bit, then start over...yet again.
Derek text-ed me shortly thereafter and wondered how it went. I wrote back that I felt it went well. At 4:45 PM on Friday afternoon, after not hearing any word of the interview or job, I text-ed Derek and wrote,"Torturing your candidates through the weekend? LOL." I heard no response, so I am on pins and needles wondering what of the situation. If I can't get a job as a receptionist with an organization my friend has a partial decision in making, I am a goner. I dutifully know that he will still be my friend, regardless. But waiting to hear any word of the situation is creating anxiety. I feel distracted, emotionally low and frustrated.
Then, my son re-nags on two "get togethers" with me. It is funny how in talking with my son, we can lift each other up and add levity to a situation. When he called after 5:30 on Friday and changed plans for an Olympia visit to Saturday instead, I was fine with that. I understood his busy schedule. Now, it is after 7:00 PM on Saturday and he has not returned two of my phone calls, of which I did not place until after 6:30 PM. I knew he would not be here until later this afternoon, but this is ridiculous. I left him a message and requested he not just come down late tonight as my housemate probably wouldn't appreciate it. I turned down an invitation to go to a play with some friends of mine as I was anticipating my son's visit. Now, I am just mad at him. Mad at the inconsideration's of so many people, when I try so hard to be responsible and considerate.
Are these pins and needles life threatening? NO. Will my world come to an end? NO. Are these situations as sad as many I have observed for others? NO. Do I deserve to be mad at my son? YES. So there, I am just mad. Despite my mood and feelings not changing any circumstance, I will fester for a bit, then start over...yet again.
Comments
You have a right to those feelings Claire. If things were all rosy, you might feel differently about the events. But when you are on pins and needles, then things will bother you more. Sending you hugs and a pin cushion to put those pins and needles in :)
kden