Inkling
This is the on line, Merriam's Dictionary meaning for inkling: a slight indication or suggestion : hint, clue, a slight knowledge or vague notion. I am wagering a guess that my blogger friends knew what this word meant before I posted it. I bet you even used the word during some conversations. Inklings...I am having me some of those today. Not a coffee pot full, not a glassful, just a cupful. Why would I have such inklings of one nature or another today? I can pinpoint this quite well, actually.
This morning, instead of heading straight to work, I was asked to go back to my friend's house to feed her two Pugs their breakfast. Ms. Doctor never made it home last night, and had driven another one of our friends to a distant town, where THAT friend's son was in the ER, unexpectedly, of course. She would not be back until much later this afternoon, so, of course I obliged and drove the 22 miles to her house to feed the dogs. On my drive there, at 7:09 AM, I was paged by a caregiver who was notifying me that she would have her boyfriend drop off her paperwork, as she was traveling to a "live-in" client's home, and wouldn't be able to turn in her weekly time card. I said that was fine. At 7:23 AM, she paged me again to hurriedly explain that she and her boyfriend were just in a car accident and were waiting for the cops and the medics to reach the scene.
"Oh my God! Are you OK?" I asked as nautrally as any.
"Yes, yes, I am, but my boyfriend is hurt. It wasn't his fault or anything like that. But as soon as I go with him to the hospital and make sure he's OK, I will have my mom pick me up and take me to work, because our car is totaled." She explained in a hurried, anxious tone, naturally.
"I am so sorry this happened to you. Are you sure you'll be able to work today?" At this time, when I knew she was OK, I selfishly was thinking..."How in the hell am I going to get another caregiver to take over a live in shift for 24 hours, at 8:00 AM?"
She assured me she was OK, and she would keep me apprised of the situation from the hospital. Next, I had to call the caregiver who should have been relieved at 8:00 AM.
"I don't like seeing your number show up on my cell phone this early in the morning." That's how she answered her phone. No hi, no good morning...and I don't blame her. This wouldn't be the first time she's covered for us on this case, in a pinch. I dutifully, and discreetly explained the circumstance. A huge sigh was her response. But she was going to "gut" it out.
I instantly loathed the cell phone and the on call system dictated to us, as supervisors, in this industry. A gut wrenching knot rose in my stomach. I have been doing this bullshit for 14 years...and I am sick of it. This is just one of the many calls that interrupted my weekend off, from the office part of the job. (We already reported to the office to work on Labor Day today...yep...) This last week I had calls 5 out of seven nights. I felt hardened at this worker's dilemma, and I duly noted, as soon as I found out she was OK, I thought about the client and my scheduling nightmares waiting for me at the office. I cringed at the thought of her creating another crappy situation with her attendance, and this was serious, and not her fault at all! But, my brain flew to my own desk of paperwork and scheduling issues, and the work load waiting for me there. I felt bad later, for having these thoughts.
I have been "paged" at the movies, in church, on a date, at Toastmaster meetings, at a baby shower, in the dead of the morning at 2 AM, risen to the pager at 4:30 AM as an alarm clock, midnight, and one time at midnight, it ended in ME going to put a wheelchair bound client to bed. I've been paged at a bar with a group of friends, traveling across state to visit my girl,in the middle of making dinner, in the middle of eating dinner, and just about any other time you can imagine. This my loyal readers...is one of the MANY reasons I wanted to get the hell out of this industry. The crappy pay, the 66 mile commute, the office demands and whiny employees who bat a ridiculous average of work ethics, and the clients who aren't happy no matter what, the redundant paperwork demanded of us by the state RCW's, and so on, and so on, and so on. I am amazed at our process, time and energy spent on new hires, only to have them bail with no notice because; something better came along, or they were accepted into nursing school or their boyfriend knocked them around so now they have to return to Texas....etc....
The positive work we do seems so outweighed by the crap of how we make it happen, it is sad. It is sad to note, the authoritative part of my job is lessening the pleasure of the "little guys" who need us, and it diminishes the wonderful stories shared with me over the years and makes them seem less and less heartwarming. (Though deep down, I treasure them. Deep down I know we are NEEDED.)
So, this circumstance is what started my inklings today. A little something else came later at work, which reinforced my inklings. I will share those a bit later.
Do you have inklings?
This morning, instead of heading straight to work, I was asked to go back to my friend's house to feed her two Pugs their breakfast. Ms. Doctor never made it home last night, and had driven another one of our friends to a distant town, where THAT friend's son was in the ER, unexpectedly, of course. She would not be back until much later this afternoon, so, of course I obliged and drove the 22 miles to her house to feed the dogs. On my drive there, at 7:09 AM, I was paged by a caregiver who was notifying me that she would have her boyfriend drop off her paperwork, as she was traveling to a "live-in" client's home, and wouldn't be able to turn in her weekly time card. I said that was fine. At 7:23 AM, she paged me again to hurriedly explain that she and her boyfriend were just in a car accident and were waiting for the cops and the medics to reach the scene.
"Oh my God! Are you OK?" I asked as nautrally as any.
"Yes, yes, I am, but my boyfriend is hurt. It wasn't his fault or anything like that. But as soon as I go with him to the hospital and make sure he's OK, I will have my mom pick me up and take me to work, because our car is totaled." She explained in a hurried, anxious tone, naturally.
"I am so sorry this happened to you. Are you sure you'll be able to work today?" At this time, when I knew she was OK, I selfishly was thinking..."How in the hell am I going to get another caregiver to take over a live in shift for 24 hours, at 8:00 AM?"
She assured me she was OK, and she would keep me apprised of the situation from the hospital. Next, I had to call the caregiver who should have been relieved at 8:00 AM.
"I don't like seeing your number show up on my cell phone this early in the morning." That's how she answered her phone. No hi, no good morning...and I don't blame her. This wouldn't be the first time she's covered for us on this case, in a pinch. I dutifully, and discreetly explained the circumstance. A huge sigh was her response. But she was going to "gut" it out.
I instantly loathed the cell phone and the on call system dictated to us, as supervisors, in this industry. A gut wrenching knot rose in my stomach. I have been doing this bullshit for 14 years...and I am sick of it. This is just one of the many calls that interrupted my weekend off, from the office part of the job. (We already reported to the office to work on Labor Day today...yep...) This last week I had calls 5 out of seven nights. I felt hardened at this worker's dilemma, and I duly noted, as soon as I found out she was OK, I thought about the client and my scheduling nightmares waiting for me at the office. I cringed at the thought of her creating another crappy situation with her attendance, and this was serious, and not her fault at all! But, my brain flew to my own desk of paperwork and scheduling issues, and the work load waiting for me there. I felt bad later, for having these thoughts.
I have been "paged" at the movies, in church, on a date, at Toastmaster meetings, at a baby shower, in the dead of the morning at 2 AM, risen to the pager at 4:30 AM as an alarm clock, midnight, and one time at midnight, it ended in ME going to put a wheelchair bound client to bed. I've been paged at a bar with a group of friends, traveling across state to visit my girl,in the middle of making dinner, in the middle of eating dinner, and just about any other time you can imagine. This my loyal readers...is one of the MANY reasons I wanted to get the hell out of this industry. The crappy pay, the 66 mile commute, the office demands and whiny employees who bat a ridiculous average of work ethics, and the clients who aren't happy no matter what, the redundant paperwork demanded of us by the state RCW's, and so on, and so on, and so on. I am amazed at our process, time and energy spent on new hires, only to have them bail with no notice because; something better came along, or they were accepted into nursing school or their boyfriend knocked them around so now they have to return to Texas....etc....
The positive work we do seems so outweighed by the crap of how we make it happen, it is sad. It is sad to note, the authoritative part of my job is lessening the pleasure of the "little guys" who need us, and it diminishes the wonderful stories shared with me over the years and makes them seem less and less heartwarming. (Though deep down, I treasure them. Deep down I know we are NEEDED.)
So, this circumstance is what started my inklings today. A little something else came later at work, which reinforced my inklings. I will share those a bit later.
Do you have inklings?
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